The things you find in your pockets

I love when I put on a pair of jeans that I haven't worn in awhile, reach into the pocket and find a $20 bill.

I hate it when I reach into the other pocket and find an ATM receipt showing that I took out $140, and that 20 is all that's left.

Kev's advice on the stomach bug

If you're thinking about exposing yourself to the stomach virus that is going around, in hopes that you can score a day off from work -- pass. Oh sure, bed rest and back-to-back episodes of 24 may seem great in theory, but when you can't even keep down water or bread, you'll wish you were right back at your desk.

On the other hand, if you're looking for a quick weight-loss regimen without having to make time for the gym, I highly recommend coming down with it.

Subway tourist ban

I'd like to propose that the MTA ban tourists in New York City from riding the subway during rush hour. It's bad enough being packed into the train car, hunched over to fit between two guys determined to take up as much space as possible so that I have to squeeze in between them like a a Tetris-block -- I don't need to also have two women in their mid-40's try and have a debate through me about whether or not Times Square is 42nd street.

And ladies, if you're reading this, yes. Yes it is.

Only in my dreams

While getting ready to go out tonight, my local radio station played Debbie Gibson's "Only in my Dreams." Now, I'm not one for censorship, but wasn't this song banned for good reason shortly after it was released in the 1980's?

I was ready to sit down and write a strongly worded letter to the station, when they played George Michael's "Faith," which is like the ultimate apology for bad 80's songs (along with Prince's "Kiss"), so I was forced to forgive them.

New Year's un-resolution

On the same day I resolved to kick my Diet Coke addiction, I decided not to give it up. If I were to stop drinking DC, I'm sure I'd start smoking cigarettes or crack, and since those are far worse, I'm sticking to my 25 cent-a-day Diet Coke habit.

The drugs in drugs

I found out recently that cold medicine is the active ingredient in crystal meth. Is that why a dose of Sudafed® always leaves me feeling so good?

Does this make crystal meth the drug of choice for junkies with a stuffy nose?