My Pppppppoker Face

Well, that's the last time I take advice from Lady GaGa!

New perspective

When you're single, and you wake up in the morning to find a bra on the floor, you think to yourself "awwww yeah!"

When your girlfriend lives with you, and you wake up in the morning to find a bra on the floor, you think to yourself, "god she's messy. Why couldn't she just put that away?"

State of the union

HD TV coverage of the State of the Union confirmed to me that Congress is NOT a beauty contest.

The new Apple iPad

Today Apple announce their new iPad. It comes in three models 16gb, 32gb and 64 gb (for those heavy flow days)

The hand lotion double standard

Why is it when a girl moves in with you, it's appropriate to have hand lotion in the bathroom, but when you're a guy living alone, everyone thinks you're a pervert?

Swine flu

I'm pretty sure Swine Flu was invented as a means to sell hand sanitizer.

The Taco Bell diet

Why don't people get the commercials for the Taco Bell diet? Eating all tacos you'd shed the pounds through massive diarrhea.

Tiger woods DVD

I'm so pissed off. I paid $25 bucks for a DVD called "Tiger Woods - my favorite 18 holes" - and the thing turns out to be about golf.

Swine flu

I've dated a few pigs in my day - am I at greater risk of getting swine flu?

The biggest loser

Watching this show makes me feel like the biggest loser.

Realisation

Following an "extremely casual" touch football team in New York from Australia may be one step sadder t... about 15 hours followingFollowing an "extremely casual" touch football team in New York from Australia may be one step sadder than being addicted to fantasy sports. Even if you are the founder of the team.

My life and times...

I've decided to start writing my biography, which I'm scared may be called, "But Why is the Rum Gone? One Man's Mission to Drink all the Alcohol in Sydney: The Kevin Silverman Story."

I started writing it the other night over a few drinks with friends on the back of three cocktail napkins. In the morning, one was missing, one was smeared with beer having been used as a coaster, and I'm not sure the third was in English.

That said, the next morning I found part of my autobiography in black marker, on my forehead, in reverse.

Double blind date

I've coined a new phase: double blind date. Like double blind experiments, where neither the doctor or the patient know what the patient is being given, a double blind date is when neither you, nor the person fixing you up has met your date.

Sounds like double the chance she won't even have a great personality.

Related post: semi-blind kind of date

Illinois gives Rod the boot

Maybe I've been spending too much time focusing on Australian politics, but I can't understand why the Illinois Senate impeached Governor Rod Blagojevich. It seems to me that he did a fine job respecting and continuing the state's long and distinguished reputation for corruption.

You reckon?

Why is it when Aussies say "you reckon" they sound folksy, but when I say it it sounds like I just stepped out of a trailer park?

More musings via Twitter

Want more musings more regularly? Add "Kev's Musings" on Twitter for brief updates. Longer musings will still be available here.

Strip clubs in Sydney

My flat here in Sydney is next to the red light district, which I need to walk through each day to get to and from the train. Some of the clubs have names like "World's Greatest Love Machine" or "The Pleasure Chest" but one is just simply called "Strippers."

I like that - these guys don't beat around the bush, so to speak.

Kev's rules for guys #327

Don't use the urinal when wearing flip flops.

Just trust me on this one.

The thin line

I'm pretty sure last night I blurred the line between going home and going to sleep and taking a brief nap between nighttime and daytime activities.

Makes it slightly more difficult since my first daytime activity is going to workout.

Sex and the Olympics

During dinner tonight with my friend Martha, we came to the conclusion that sex is not unlike the uneven bars event at the Olympics.

You start on the high bar, a few twists, a few turns, and then you move on down to the low bar. Once you've spent enough time down there, you give it one last flip and then dismount (hopefully to thunderous applause).

And if you're really lucky, the French judge gives you a score higher than an 6.4.